Tuesday, September 23, 2014

America's Next Top Roommate

My roommate is moving out in a few weeks - so now I have the privilege of finding a new co-inhabitant in my fancy San Francisco digs. Given I have found a place to live my fair share of times on Craigslist, I've become some sort of elitist when it comes to posting publicly.

J: Did you post on Craigslist?
Me: Oh, God, no.
J: Why not?
Me: I could not be bothered to filter out crackheads and perverts.
J: Where are you posting, then?
Me: Through Google and other tech internal forums. At least they do the prelim background searches for you, and if shit hits the fan, you can start some office gossip to ruin their lives.
J: Really thought this through.
Me: Yup.

Through both my roommate and my networks, we managed to find four viable candidates. The choice will be made by the end of today. Exciting, I know.

1 - The Young Blood: (6/10)
You know those kids on Silicon Valley who look like they're 18-years-old, but write intense code on some platform we don't even know how to pronounce? Yea, that's this girl. She looks young, but I know with certainty that she is part of the Engineering team somewhere. And you know how they are - they won't even share the free yogurt in their special fridge.

YB: Is there a nightlife around here?
Me: No, we're in SoMa.
YB: Where do you hang out?
Me: It embarrasses me how I don't know how to answer your question.
YB: What do you do at Google?
Me: Sales operations.
YB: Oh... (super judgmentally)

2 - Aussie Cat Lady (8/10)
She didn't bother to tell me anything about herself, but sent me about a dozen pictures of her two cats. She gets major points for being pretty, though, and also, given she's an Aussie, I'm hoping I can learn how to imitate the Aussie accent without offending her too much.

3 - Golden Retriever Girl (9/10)
She introduced herself by sending me her blog and let me just say, it's FANTASTIC. She's a UX/UI designer, which means after she decorates this apartment, I'll feel like I died and woke up in Room&Board heaven. I'm sort of looking forward to that.

Me: I'm leaning towards the girl with the Golden Retriever.
Temm: You can't pick a roommate based on their pet.
Me: But it's been my dream to have a roommate with a dog!

4 - Fobby Korean (9/10)
I got this referral through church. Background story, I had a roommate back in college I met through church and she ended up stealing my identify AND my favorite pair of jeans. I've been scarred. But this girl just gave up her return offer to McK and went to Stanford GSB. That speaks monuments about her character - in a good way, for those who are unclear.

FK: I'm joining a start-up so I'll be working really late nights.
Me: I watch Korean dramas so I have really late nights too.
FK: Oh, I can watch Korean dramas with you.
Me: This... might work.

We'll see what happens. I'm sad to lose my roommate to the Marina (seriously, who moves from SoMa to the Marina - that's like taking a pay cut to go from McK to Google... oh, wait). But I'm also thankful that I have some great people who are actually interested in living with me. They have no idea how weird I can get.

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